We do think about this strangeness sometimes....
Our friend, Kevin, used to say we thought about shit too much, tried to figure out things that don't necessarily need to be figured out.
I'd like to figure out, or to know, how the me of me can be here, but my body is in Otherwhere. I'd like to understand how they can take Michael from Earth, a part of this Michael, to Otherwhere. I guess it is a matter of need. They needed someone in Otherwhere to take care of them, to be there. The Guardians needed someone to be here, to manage this household. Alhtough as time passes I find that i fit in here in this reality better I don't think I will ever be able to be entirely of this world. I am not of this Earth even though I live in this body, this earth body, in this earth reality.
When the interface between this body and myself is good, it seems as if this would be an easy way to be. Yet at times I feel disjointed, off balance. My sense of my own self is too strong to be lost here. It often surprises me that my connection with the knowledge that this body holds is so seamless. I listen to myself in wonder, hearing words come out of my mouth about having had children. I can know what it is like to have a child even though i have never had one. Yet my own memories are so strong. Memories of the Ma'Harrat, my world, my mother, my lover, my people, hunting, tracking, making love.
It then brings me back to how can I be in two places at once? How can the interface with this body be so complete and yet the memories of my life with the Ma'Harrat be so clear and strong.
I wonder if it is the same guiding hand in all the worlds in all the universes in all of existence?
Diana cor Sha'Neen
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